Television Shows That Never Should Have Been Canceled - A Tribute (Part One)

With 2012 just around the corner, one can't help but look back and reflect on what this past year has given us in terms of the best and the worst that television has to offer. Since primetime television has come to an effective standstill because of the holidays, I found myself reminiscing about the TV shows that were never really given a fair chance to flex their muscles and show us what they really had to offer. The advent of reality shows (whom I consider to be the scum of television) has seriously deprived genuinely promising TV shows the opportunity to garner a bigger audience. And without the numbers to show for it, shows that deserve a second chance don't usually get one.

Screw the networks. They may have dropped these shows in the meanest way possible, but let us give them the proper accolades they so richly deserve.

I would actually like to go a step further and mention some of the shows that were canceled before 2011, because they deserve to be mentioned AND remembered.


HUMAN TARGET

I loved this show! It was the perfect blend of action and comedy to keep me interested for an hour. The stories were engaging, the action scenes were fantastic, the dialogue was witty & clean-cut, and the cast was simply brilliant.
Mark Valley as Christopher Chance put his best foot forward in this role. After his seriously lame stint as Brad Chase in Boston Legal, I was happy to finally see him in a show that gave him enough space to shine. Chi McBride as Winston and Jackie Earle Haley as Guerrero provided serious backup both in terms of action and entertainment. Guerrero in particular, had some really hilarious moments that I sorely miss.

Season two added two new characters to the mix (Ilsa Pucci & Ames) that actually added another element to the show that I didn't think it missed! You would think that this combination would work, and I personally thought the series was going in an interesting direction when wouldn't you know it, the hell hounds from FOX decided to cancel it. The action/adventure genre is a dying one and this cancellation didn't help.
So where's Mark Valley now?? Pretty much where he was before Human Target, in a douchey role in another douchey David E. Kelly show where he plays the exact same character.
Mark!! If you're reading this (fat chance. Ha!), you got screwed big time, bro. You're talents are being wasted on Harry's Law. Get the hell out of there!


THE CHICAGO CODE

After The Shield, I was eagerly waiting for Shawn Ryan to deliver another series that would make me not dislike cop shows again. The Chicago Code got me hooked from episode one. The fact that it got dropped by FOX after a single thirteen episode season had me breathing fire for a week.
Jason Clarke is one of those underrated actors who deserves his own show. This was finally a role he could sink his teeth into, and he was doing it with absolute magnificence. Jennifer Beals' strong presence was an added bonus in itself, but to top it all off with Delroy Lindo as Alderman Gibbons? What could go wrong, right?

The show was a realistic interpretation of the politics and the power struggle between City Hall and the Chicago Police Department. It possessed Shawn Ryan's inimitable style coupled with brilliant work from both sides of the camera.
So what the hell happened?? Ask FOX Entertainment Chairman Peter Rice. He's the only guy (that we know about) who knows the answer. And although the show wrapped things up nicely in the series finale, another promising show got kicked in the nuts for no logical reason.


FIREFLY

This was without a doubt the MOST MASSIVE SCREW-UP in the history of the FOX network. Joss Whedon's space/western masterpiece was arguably the best show ever to be canceled too soon. The sci-fi genre lost its most precious jewel the day the FOX execs made this blunder of galactic proportions.
Whether it was the cast, the action, the visual effects or the environment in general, Firefly made me a resident browncoat for life.

It was absolutely despicable what the network did to this show. Although the actors involved have moved on and carved separate roles for themselves in different shows (though none of them will ever be as good), this half-assed butchery by FOX made me boycott the network for a couple of years. And make no mistake, every time someone mentions Firefly in my presence, I imagine a representative of the FOX network spitting teeth. I have been appeased a little since then after Nathan Fillion re-entered primetime TV on Castle.
But seriously, who would you rather watch?? Richard Castle or Malcolm Reynolds?

So what does FOX ( aka The American Idol Network) have to offer now on its current primetime lineup?
Except for Fringe (which might be canceled too by the way, wtf?) and House, the lineup represents a list of shows that uniformly suck. I have a special place in my garbage disposal for Glee.
So here's the bottom line.

All eyes are on you, FOX! Except mine.
I have a finger pointed in your direction. Wanna guess which one?

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Person Of Interest - Ten Reasons Why John Reese Is Better Than Batman

Ever since the coolest mid-season finale of 2011, I've been waiting like an obsessed maniac for 2012, not just because it's a New Year (yippee!) but because I am eagerly awaiting the next episode of Person Of Interest with twitchy fingers and bated breath.

Those of you who've seen all ten episodes of season one will undoubtedly agree that after a promising start, POI has suddenly bludgeoned its way to the top of many DVR lists. It's initial reputation as a case-of-the-week procedural has been overshadowed by multiple juicy plot lines that simply came out of nowhere! This is my personal favorite show of 2011. No surprise, since any show with J.J. Abrams and Jonathan Nolan at the helm was bound to be TV gold.

This year has introduced us to some very interesting characters on Primetime television, but the dynamic duo of John Reese and Harold Finch is arguably one of the best. I don't have enough adjectives in my vocabulary to describe just how awesome these two characters (and actors) have made this show.
Over the course of two months, we have seen John Reese do some seriously kickass stuff. One can't help but compare his recent accomplishments to those of the original dark knight.

So is John Reese based on Batman?? Jonathan Nolan was one of the brains behind director and big bro Christopher Nolan's The Dark Knight and the soon to be released The Dark Knight Rises. Was his inspiration behind POI entrenched in his previous experience researching Batman? If it was, he couldn't have chosen a better template to introduce us to this truly amazing character. And although many of you might disagree, I personally believe that Nolan has created an idea (and an individual) capable of exceeding the inspiration behind it!

The title of this post obviously caught your eye, so I'm going to stop rambling and get right down to it!
I hereby present ten reasons why John Reese is better than Batman:

1. In the Pilot episode, the Rip Van Winkle version of Reese beat up a bunch of bratty gangster wannabees in a subway train, and then the new and improved version came back and shot the same dudes each in their respective thighs. Batman could probably do the same thing, but he refuses to use guns and doesn't fight during the daytime. Wuss.

2. Reese has a smooth, baritone voice. Batman (at least, the Christian Bale version), sounds like a frog in a blender.

3. Harold Finch is Reese's partner. Robin is Batman's sidekick. Benjamin Linus trumps G. Callen. Nuff said.

4. Reese has a cool motorcycle. Batman has the batmobile. Who do you think has an easier time finding a parking space??

5. Reese's police counterpart is Carter. Batman has Commissioner Gordon. Carter is way hotter than Commissioner Gordon. So is Fusco.

6. Reese makes mincemeat out of the bad guys in every episode. After over seventy years, Batman still hasn't got the Joker off his ass. Kill the guy already!

7. John Reese doesn't take credit for the things he does. Batman's kind of a media hog.

8. John Reese prevents crimes before they happen and saves lives. Batman mopes around in the bat cave until someone flashes the bat signal. Either that or he's attending parties as Bruce Wayne. Talk about being a self absorbed prick!

9. John Reese puts on a suit and swings into action. Batman has to wear his bullet-proof batsuit, put on all his gadgets, get inside the batmobile and drive all the way to Gotham City from his mansion. It's an automatic head start for the bad guys. Besides Reese doesn't even wear a vest. Now that's confidence!

10. John Reese has an arsenal of sub-machine guns, assault rifles and grenade launchers. Batman has a few batarangs, the bathook, a grapple gun, and if memory serves me right, a bat-taser. Tee hee! Cute.

Stop shaking your fist at the monitor!
I'm bored. There was nothing to watch tonight. Gimme a break.

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American Horror Story - And They Lived Happily Ever After....Eh??

If someone were to ask me a year from now about what happened in the first season of American Horror Story, I'm pretty sure I'm going to shrug my shoulders and go "Duh, I dunno. It's kind of a blur". The truth is, too many things have happened in a short span of twelve episodes. It's like getting hit by a baseball right between the eyes and waking up a few days later having no recollection of what transpired. Yet you know whatever happened, it was big and it hurt like a mother. From the writers' point of view however (in their own messed up universe), season one has been wrapped up and tied into a nice and severely twisted bow.

With Ben being the sole living occupant left inside murder house...no wait. I take that back. I forgot the baby. With Ben and the baby being the only living occupants left inside murder house, it made sense for the two to get the hell out of there and run for the hills. But to be in Ben's place, after what he's been through, I wasn't surprised he was going to blow his brains out. Baby or no baby (especially the product of a ghost rape), there's only a certain amount of horsecrap in one's life that can be endured. Vivien's pep talk for Ben was actually quite inspiring. I find it hilarious that the characters actually become smarter and more rational after they're dead! First Violet, and now Vivien. No wonder they killed Ben off too.

That's right! Just as Ben (after taking Vivien's advice) was getting ready to vamoose and leave murder house for good (baby included), Hayden and her new posse ambushed Papa Harmon and strung him up from a chandelier. Not that it mattered at this point in the story. Dead? Alive? In this show it hardly makes a difference. It actually turned out pretty well for the Harmons because for the first time ever in season one, Ben, Vivien and Violet were together AND happy.

And what about the baby?
Hayden became the temporary spectral guardian for the satanic little squirt. That is, until Constance paid her a visit. Constance is like the John Reese of American Horror Story. You don't frak with Constance! With a little help from her now dead boy-toy Travis, baby Antichrist was finally where he belonged. In Constance's uh...motherly hands. What are the implications of all this? Wait for a year and find out.

Meanwhile, after Ben's unceremonious (yet oddly satisfying) death, believe it or not, another couple bought and moved into murder house! Doesn't anybody use google these days? If close to twenty people have died in a single house you would think it would be more famous, especially since it happens to be the highlight of the Eternal Darkness Tour!!

The entry and exit of the Ramos family was like a mini-horror movie in itself. In fact, those fifteen minutes or so pretty much represented all the 'haunted house' movies out there. Whether it was a tribute or an insult, it was undoubtedly funny! The scene where Ben and Vivien 'kill' each other was awesome! You don't get to smile often in this show (unless it's one of those nervous "I just let one rip" smiles), but the weirdness with which it was executed was spot on. This is awesome writing, folks. Even if it is messed up!

The conversation between Ben and Tate was my personal favorite moment of the episode. I've forgotten how good an actor Dylan McDermott really is. His speech gave us a perfect representation of an individual who has accepted his flaws and is paying for it. In a way, he actually gave Tate his best professional opinion yet.
I was kind of disappointed he didn't beat the living (or dead) crap out of him though. Tate needs a little retribution flung in his direction. And a broken heart doesn't count.

So what are the questions we must ask heading into season two? I can only think of one.

What's next???
Yes, the child is supposed to be the spawn of Satan. So what?? The Harmons are stuck inside murder house and the way things were looking, they're American horror story is over. So we're either going to focus on a new family in the same house, which is too monotonous to be true, or we'll focus on toddler Antichrist and Constance. However, the Tate and Violet storyline still felt unfinished, so I'm hopeful the same cast will come back next season.

Tidbits

- You've never heard of the Eternal Darkness Tour?? Either google it or watch the entire season again.
- How creepy was the whole Christmas tree scene? Do ghosts celebrate Christmas? What if they're Jewish? Do they have Matzah Balls for ghosts?
- So Vivien now has a baby who will permanently be six months old. That baby will cease to be cute after a thousand diaper changes.

Will you miss American Horror Story?
After a surprisingly satisfying season and an even more satisfying finale, I think I will. Especially Thaddeus.

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Dexter - Farewell Season 6....Thou Sucketh Big Time!

And there it is! The only way season 6 could have saved face this week (which it didn't) was with a cliffhanger. And it was a cliffhanger that is going to stick with me like an obstinate rash. Debra finally met Dexter's dark passenger tonight. The problem is, the rest of 'This Is The Way The World Ends' was so boring I almost missed it!

Having been thoroughly disappointed and pissed off after last week's episode (as were a zillion other fans), it was only an obligation for me to watch the finale. I've been watching this show loyally for five years. There's no way in hell I'm gonna let that go down the crapper! The fact that we had to endure six completely mediocre episodes after Brother Sam's demise should have earned the viewer an appropriate sendoff, right? Nope. Not according to the writers.

We all knew Dexter was going to be saved from his predicament last week. I half expected them to just cut to Dexter and Harrison having breakfast at home as if nothing happened! I guess even the writers have limits to their mediocrity. The alternative was nothing to write home about either. So...is Dexter just killing people in front of witnesses now? What the bleedin' hell was that about?? Maybe killing the gun toting Hispanic dude was just to make up for not offing anyone last week. Totally lame and hair-tearingly frustrating! You are ruining Dexter for me, guys! Seriously!!

Cut to the crime scene with the double murder and it's like an episode of CSI Miami, the kindergarten edition. The fact that Dexter almost died and nobody except Debra seemed to give a flying frak about it is beside the point. Do you seriously mean to tell me that everyone, the responding officers, the homicide detectives, even Masuka (who was nowhere to be seen), were waiting for Dexter to arrive before entering the crime scene? Apparently he was the first and only person to spot his surly mug on Travis's painting so he went ahead and did a number on it with a hammer. I'm not a cop, so grunt once if I'm wrong, but don't the police have to clear the house and do a cursory examination first? Especially one where a double murder has taken place? Nobody saw the painting?? Come on!

Could things get any more lame? Yes they could! To round things off nicely, we have Travis driving by the crime scene in slow-mo and nobody, not a single cop notices him drive by. Isn't there supposed to be a police canvas outside a crime scene? I think he even parked nearby. Let me reiterate the fact that Miami Metro Homicide is the WORST EVER.

In the meantime, Debra and Dexter were having a contest of sorts to see who had the more awkward stare. Deb's mixed feelings for her step-brother almost came to the surface this week, until they were rudely interrupted by the sight of Dex stabbing Travis in the chest with a nice meaty scrunch.

The writers completely blew off the Louis Greene storyline for this season with only one lame ass scene where Masuka basically told Louis to go screw himself after he expressed hopes of continuing to work at Miami Metro. Though God only knows why he would want to. He gave Dexter a genuinely soupy glance after the conversation. Man crush? Nah! There's got to more to it than that. Right?

On the bright side, LaGuerta was less of a bitch in this episode. Many people expressed a strong desire for her exit from the show in the most gruesome fashion. There's still next season, dudes.
Quinn continued to be a royal jackass. It should come naturally to him by now. It was good to see Batista finally grow a pair and do something about Quinn's recent dickish behavior. I completely forgot he made sergeant last season!

So that's it! The downward trend that began in season 5 continued through season 6 (with a small spike in between in the form of Brother Sam). We could bitch and moan all day about how frustrating this season was. But we still watched the whole damn thing. Didn't we?


Tidbits

- When Debra called Dex after the pageant was over, how did Travis pick the opportune moment to abduct Harrison? He didn't even know Dexter was still alive! Didn't he spot Dex hovering around his own kid?? Wasn't he lying in wait to kidnap Harrison when the kid would be alone? Put that in your pipe and smoke it.
- The number of hair tearing moments this season saved me twelve bucks on a haircut.
- Dexter killed Travis. Just wanted to let you know in case you missed it.

So long season 6! Don't let the door smack your holy ass on the way out!

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Grimm - Rapunzel Is A Werewolf. Who Knew?

NBC has been going out of its way to try and promote its newest fantasy/mystery/cop drama, Grimm. After seven episodes (all of which I've seen), I think I'm in a pretty decent position to render judgment on this undoubtedly unique show. So what do I think? Well, I'm still on the fence to be honest.

It's usually pretty evident when a show is good or bad at the outset. After watching the pilot, I was hopeful that I would warm up to the characters. The current situation presents a mixed bag of sorts, with many elements both good and bad. Let us carry out a dissection of sorts, shall we?

THE CAST

Call me old fashioned, but if a show has any hope of making it big on primetime TV, the main character needs to be likeable, and he should have a freakin' personality! Nick Burkhardt possesses neither of those qualities. David Giuntoli is wooden and completely unremarkable as the supposedly scary hunter of supernatural forces. If Grimm (the show) is going to brave the tide, we need to connect with the characters, and at the moment, I don't give a rat's ass if Nick Burkhardt gets mauled by a Jagerbar (that's Grimm speak for bear).

On the other end of the spectrum, let's talk about Monroe, the friendliest Blutbad (apparently call Wieder Blutbads because of their abstinence from eating humans, as opposed to normal Blutbads, who eat humans), in Portland, played by the talented Silas Weir Mitchell. The SOLE reason I tune in every week is to see if Monroe would get more screen time. His dialogue is sharp and witty in stark contrast to Nick, who could be speaking Croatian and it wouldn't make a difference.

Russell Hornsby as Hank Griffin (Nick's partner) does a decent enough job. No complaints from my side as far as he's concerned. I actually wouldn't have minded if Hank was the Grimm with Monroe as his sidekick. The show would have been WAY better.

A special mention for Sasha Roiz as Captain Renard. Having seen him in a wide variety of shows, it's good to finally see him cast as a regular character in this one. I know he was in Caprica, but I've never seen it, so there.

THE PREMISE

The idea is actually a unique one. With the fantasy genre having a rebirth of sorts, clubbing The Brothers Grimms' Fairy Tales with the modern day criminal procedural is a brilliant idea. But all brilliant ideas have to be implemented properly, and that's where this show is yet to score.

Bear with me on this. If Grimms are the alleged scourges of the supernatural world, shouldn't you expect them to have special abilities beyond just spotting the ugly mug of a well concealed monster? So Nick is basically a grown up Haley Joel Osment who can spot monsters instead of dead people. Remember the pilot where Nick's aunt had crazy wicked jujitsu moves?? Nick got his ass handed to him by a female Blutbad last week. Not very interesting to watch, folks.

The reason why shows like Supernatural (hell yeah!) have such a die hard fan base (myself included) is because the cast is brilliant, the stories are engaging and the entire package just works. I know we've only seen seven episodes, but I honestly don't see Grimm achieving cult status or even remotely heading in a similar direction. Not unless a few changes are made. The stories are interesting without a doubt, but a connection between the viewers and the characters needs to be established. And that hasn't happened yet.

For the time being, I will continue to watch and see if things change. The stories are still 'out of the box' representations of The Grimms' Fairy Tales and I'm not ashamed to admit the idea still sounds very appealing.

Tidbits

- Clear something up for me. Is Wu (Reggie Lee) a sergeant or an officer?? The detectives called him Sgt. Wu in a previous episode (which makes him their superior), but he became Officer Wu in episode 7 (which makes him a rank below them). Either Wu got demoted big time or I'm missing something.
- Nick Burkhardt has done nothing remarkable or Grimm-like since he found out he was a Grimm. Chop off a few monster heads, dude. Do something to make me root for you!!
- Hey what did happen to Haley Joel Osment??
- Credit where credit is due. Love the monster faces. Check out the picture above!

Dexter and Hell On Wheels are on tomorrow night. 2011 should end with a bang. Right?

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Person Of Interest - Game On!

Now that's what I'm talkin' about!! In what has been a satisfying week of television so far, Person Of Interest packed a significant wallop tonight, thus solidifying it's place as one of the best (if not the best) shows of 2011. 'Number Crunch' was quite possibly the best episode of the series, with 'Witness' and 'Cure Te Ipsum' at second and third place respectively.

Finch's machine provided yet another unexpected problem for Batman and Robin to solve, in the form of not two, not three, but four different social security numbers! This episode didn't exactly catch Finch and Reese at their best as the bodies started dropping faster than Tiger Woods could switch mistresses. The situation was an unaccustomed one for both, especially Finch, who for the first time in this season seemed to be genuinely flustered. It was cool to see Reese actually offer Finch a few honeyed words of consolation. I think this partnership just switched to friendship, folks!

As it turns out, these four people happened to stumble upon an accident involving a cocaine-coated Congressman's son who died on impact with a buttload of cash in his car. So naturally, these four pillars of the community did what any self-respecting dude would do in this economy. They pinched the dough. This would later prove to be fatal for two of the four, because as it so often happens, the money (which is of course illegal) belongs to the Congressman (who is corrupt. No really!) and his partner, who hires a dude and a dudette to get the money back and tie up loose ends. But before things could get any worse, the dude and the dudette got Reesed and the Congressman and his business partner got Finched. End of story? Nope. I missed out the good part!

Carter had a very interesting role to play in this episode. With the CIA now aware that Reese is still alive , I didn't expect her to fold so easily and give up Reese's location. It was a moral dilemma that ultimately solved itself when Carter finally helped Reese escape with Finch. Detective Carter seems to have finally made her decision about Reese, although it almost got him killed tonight.

So now there are loads of questions swimming around in my mind -

- Why does the CIA want Reese dead? The story that Reese killed his handler might be true, but the rest is bull. It's more likely that Snow and the other dude are rogue agents trying to clean up a mess they created.
- Where do Reese and Carter go from here? Friends or Foes? Is Fusco going to lose his status as Reese's police contact?
- The photograph Reese saw at Finch's place. N.I probably stands for N. Ingram, the dude from episode 2 (Ghosts). How did Ingram die? Does Finch's limp have something to do with it?
- Where does Elias fit into all of this?

Speaking of episode 2, I remember a split second scene between Finch and Ingram in 2007, where Finch switches off one of the computers with Reese's ex-girlfriend's photo on the screen. Reese's ex is dead, folks. There may come a point in the series where both Reese and Finch will realize that her death could have been prevented.

Whew! I could go on and on. This show still has a lot of avenues to explore and I will definitely be along for the ride.

Tidbits

- Reese got shot in the gut and the leg. He still managed to return fire and limp away from an NYPD detective and two CIA trained operatives. Badass!
- No episode of Person Of Interest is complete without a Fusco joke. Finch commenting about Fusco's digestive tract was hilarious!
- I borrowed Reese's motorcycle this week. Sorry dudes!

I had no idea this was the mid-season finale. The next episode is in 2012. Crumbs.

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American Horror Story - Show Me The Baby!

At the cost of sounding crass, I'm just going to come out and say it.
HOLY FREAKIN' FRAK!! (Battlestar Galactica expletive)

If you've just watched tonight's episode of American Horror Story titled 'Birth', you are more than likely to share my sentiments about how disturbingly awesome this particular episode was. And yes, this was without a doubt, the BEST episode of AHS to date, hands down.

I've had my reservations about how the majority of the characters on this show have been portrayed as intolerable douchebags. But tonight, the entire AHS family (both dead & alive) got together to help Vivien deliver her baby(s). Vivien's delivery was possibly the weirdest scene in television history and more importantly it will be remembered as one of the best of this year. Where else can you see a murderous surgeon ghost deliver the Antichrist??

This episode had too many things happening too fast for my brain to process. No sooner had Vivien delivered baby number two that another mega bombshell came crashing onto our skulls. Vivien's death. There's not a viewer on the planet who would have expected THAT to happen. So what is the ultimate result of all this? Everyone of significance in this show is dead, except Ben and Constance (unless she's dead too, and I'm missing something).

This series began as a typical "unsuspecting & dysfunctional family moves into a haunted house" scenario, but it has blossomed and ventured into completely unchartered territory and for that, kudos to Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk. Mission accomplished, dudes. You have our undivided attention!

There were other bombshells being showered from the ceiling of murder house tonight, a significant one being Ben's ultimate realization that the haunted house is indeed haunted. Imagine watching your wife's babies being delivered by a ghost, surrounded by other ghosts, one of the ghosts being your own daughter.
Yes, Ben Harmon has had a bad night.

Bombshell number three was Violet finally realizing that Tate raped Vivien. This was the only episode in the show where Violet actually made some good decisions for a change. The fact that she had to die first to become responsible is kind of disturbing. It was a strong and well shot scene where Violet cried in Vivien's arms (who's now dead).  It was also great to watch Violet tell Tate to go take a hike. I like dead Violet better than living, breathing Violet.

Earlier in the episode, Chad and Patrick were frontrunners in the spectral game of "who gets the babies?". Billie Dean's 'Croatoan' idea (obscure Supernatural reference) backfired big time on Violet. But it was interesting to note that being a ghost doesn't mean you can't wear expensive watches.
So the question is - How do you banish a ghost, any ghost, from murder house??

I guess the game of "who gets the baby?" (the edited version), will continue next week with loads of players involved (all of them dead, except Constance). Meanwhile, what's Ben's place in all this?? It's kind of weird to remain in a house where you're the only LIVING person left! He's not gonna stay there with his dead wife and daughter, is he?? Creepy.

Tidbits

- It's about time someone finally gave Tate the beating he so richly deserved. Now with Violet as the newest member of the "I Hate Tate" club (I'm the president), Tate's gimp suit days are over.
- Stillborn baby number one went to Nora. Does that mean the baby's permanently going to be six months old??
- Who wants a catfight between Vivien, Hayden and Constance over the baby? I do! Not much of a fight though, Constance could kick their collective asses.
- You know, all this could have been avoided if the Winchesters had paid a visit to murder house in episode one. Just saying.

The season finale next week might be our last episode with the Harmons. I dunno.
Anything's possible with this show!

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Primetime Television - Don't Rock The Boat

Over the last couple of years or so, television has undergone a major overhaul. What used to be quality TV just doesn't make the cut anymore. Or so I've been told. With the array of 'new age' shows like Glee, American Horror Story and Fringe (with their 'out of the box' storylines) doing the rounds, I still believe there is room for the serialized, conventional, standalone episode-of-the-week type of series.

I usually find myself flipping channels a couple of nights a week, hoping to discover something new. But the search eventually ends up being fruitless. So what do I end up watching? What do I fall back on? Do I switch off the TV and do something productive for a change? Yeah right.

I'm pretty sure I'm not the only couch potato out there who still has tremendous respect for shows like NCIS, Criminal Minds and Law & Order SVU. These are still the true giants of primetime television in my opinion, and regardless of how good the last episode of Revenge was, or how sucky last night's Glee was, the trend shouldn't exhibit a significant change. At least I hope not.

Personally, I could watch NCIS and Flashpoint reruns all day and not get bored. Could you say the same for American Horror Story? Yeah, it's interesting when you see it once, but watching it again actually FEELS like a waste of time (you're still wasting time watching TV, you losers). Another aspect of these shows is consistency. You KNOW that regardless of what the story is, an episode of Criminal Minds will always be entertaining. The reliability associated with serialized shows is severely lacking in these newer shows. I've never seen Glee (I have a brain I still intend to use). But from what people (who prefer to be anonymous for fear of being ostracized by humanity) have told me, not every episode delivers on quality. Similarly, I watch American Horror Story every week, and honestly, there are occasions during which I wish I didn't.

That being said, some bad shows undoubtedly still do get through the cracks and inexplicably get renewed every year (cough..NCIS: Los Angeles), while more deserving shows like The Chicago Code get stomped on for not having sufficient backing from network heavyweights, despite how good those shows may be. How else can you explain trash like Whitney (blech) getting renewed for an ENTIRE season? Trust me, the show is no better than How To Be A Gentleman. So what happens behind the scenes? We may never know. At least I won't.

The point I'm trying to drive across is this - Sometimes an intriguing show like Ringer might come along and wow you with it's fresh (yet loopy) story, coupled with bad CGI that makes you cringe, but keeps you interested just the same. But how long will it last? Never underestimate a good episode of Castle. It might not be spectacular, but it works. And you get to see Nathan Fillion every week!

Let me sign off by giving you a rundown of the current shows I like, the shows I'm on the fence with, and the shows I hate with a VENGEANCE -

Likes (in no specific order) - Supernatural, Justified, Game Of Thrones, Person Of Interest, The Mentalist, Castle, Dexter, Breaking Bad, The Big Bang Theory, Community, Boss, Hell On Wheels, NCIS, Flashpoint, Criminal Minds, Suburgatory, Modern Family, Psych (hee hee), Leverage (Parker, woof!)

On The Fence - The Closer, Revenge, Fringe, The Walking Dead, The Good Wife, Two and a Half Men, Once Upon A Time, Grimm, American Horror Story, The Office (without Michael Scott), Harry's Law, all the CSIs.

Shows That Royally Suck - Whitney (yech), New Girl (I hate it. Period), How I Met Your Mother, Glee (yes I haven't seen it, my hate for the show is unreasonably immense), NCIS: Los Angeles, Burn Notice (all fluff and no substance), Royal Pains (ditto), Bones (I don't get the hype), Unforgettable.

AHS is on tonight. I am reluctant yet curious to watch what's next on the show.

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Hell On Wheels - Swedish Dances

I was honestly more excited about watching yesterday's episode of Hell On Wheels than the current piss poor season of Dexter. Every disappointing episode of Dexter has been followed by an uplifting one from this promising show. 'Pride, Pomp And Circumstance' wasn't one of the best episodes, but it had a lot going for it to make it relevant.

So with the settlement getting ready for the arrival of the Cheyenne, Reverend Cole had a small favor to ask Cullen (guess what he was doing at the time? That's right! Glug glug). A group of Indians paying a visit to an American settlement does not exactly constitute a cordial environment. Cole asked Cullen to keep his workers in check, lest the railroad be decorated with scalps of different shapes and sizes.

Remember Senator Jordan Crane? The dude Durant blackmailed in episode 1? The same dude paid a visit to Hell On Wheels this week to oversee negotiations with the Cheyenne and to make sure Doc D was keeping his nose clean (which he wasn't. Not by a long shot). And wouldn't you know it? The Swede has been feeding info to Crane all this time. Crane discovers Durant has siphoned off 147,000 smackeroonies of railroad money for his own personal use. So Crane has Durant's nut sack in a vice grip for a change, and he let him know it.

Meanwhile the negotiation with Chief Many Horses didn't go well. Not that we were expecting it to go well. The Chief's argument made me stop and think for a moment. The Industrial Revolution was a landmark in human history, but it came at great cost. Some had to pay for it more than others. It never hurts to reflect and acknowledge the price people have paid for the advancement of civilization.

Back at the construction site, Toole (fuzzy Irish dude who has a bee in his bonnet for Elam) got in Cullen's face for losing to Elam and for stopping him and his boys from doing what Reverend Cole was afraid of. Cullen (and the rest of us) finally got tired of his accent and his fuzziness, and thus decided to fire his ass. But fuzzy dude had big plans for this episode. Round two involved a second attempt to go with his armed comrades to confront the Cheyenne, but Cullen (doing his Clint Eastwood impression) would have none of it. And next came the coolest scene in the episode!

How awesome was it to see Cullen and The Swede on the same side of things? I was rubbing my hands together going "Hell yeah, it's on!". This show already has loads of cool moments and this was one of the best.

But wait, fuzzy dude wasn't done yet! Now visibly frustrated and pissed, he decided to direct his ire at the person it was originally intended for. It was an added bonus that Elam was in the act of getting cosy with Eva at the time. So will Elam get his ass whooped? Or will Cullen step in? Again?

After the discovery that Joseph's tribe was indeed the same one that was responsible for her husband's death, Lily had a rough time in this episode. She even hinted that her stay at Hell On Wheels will be ending soon. After finally giving Durant the maps, she gave me the impression that she's done trying to be someone she's not.

Overall, the series has given us another solid episode. But to keep the viewers interested, the story needs to move faster than it is right now. A gunfight between Toole and Elam sounds good. Or maybe an entire episode where we just follow The Swede around? Doesn't that sound cool?

Tidbits

- I personally thought the race between Pawnee killer (the Chief's son) and the train was redundant (am I using that right?). Maybe it had symbolic relevance, but I didn't feel it.
- I'm still waiting for Common to miraculously reveal a different facial expression. So the probable ass whooping he's going to get next week is kind of a welcome development. Either that, or he needs to get his bowels evacuated.
- Anson Mount is starting to grow on me as an actor. Maybe it's The Swede's influence.

What do I watch tonight? I miss Deadwood.

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Dexter - Bowels Of Wrath

I was pretty excited after watching the promo for Dexter last week. It had loads of snippets which looked promising and gave me new hope that possibly, maybe, hopefully the writers will see the light and end season 6 with a colossal bang. After some mediocre episodes in the last few weeks, 'Talk To The Hand' sort of fueled my faith in this series.

Make no mistake, I HATE the way the writers have handled Dexter this season, but if I'm going to watch season 7 (and I will), a finale of ginormous proportions needs to happen next week. I'm pretty used to being underwhelmed by this show by now, so imagine my surprise when I found myself at the edge of my seat when Beth (lady whose husband Dex stabbed last week), walked into Miami Metro with a bag of Wormwood. It's been a while since Dexter got something right, so stopping Beth from making the air inside Miami Metro as poisonous as the air inside the Enron complex was a step in the right direction. That being said, the rest of the episode was kind of a bummer.

Let's be realistic. Every time we see Dexter in danger, we know nothing's actually going to happen. Apparently the writers have come to realize this and didn't even bother to leave the viewers hanging when Dexter escaped Travis's ring of fire.

Batista's capture had an ominous vibe to it in the last episode, so imagine my chagrin when Quinn (yuck), of all people actually did something right for a change and saved Batista from becoming a Cuban-American barbecue. Now Batista has to live with the shame of owing his life to Quinn (ugh). The shame!

Another significant and weird development was the conversation between Debra and shrink lady. The suggestion that Debra might have romantic feelings for Dexter, caught her completely off guard as it did everyone else. Now with the idea planted in Deb's head, it was only a matter of time before she would actually have a dream about getting it on with her step-brother. Nice going, shrink lady! Weren't you supposed to solve Debra's problems??

Meanwhile, LaGuerta revealed a whole new level of bitchiness by getting Matthews fired for the hooker fiasco. Miami Metro consists of an array of morons of different shapes and sizes, but now with LaGuerta at the helm, there is no limit to the level of incompetence the division can achieve. Dexter's dark passenger is going to have his hands full next season.

The MOST interesting part of this episode, in my irrelevant (but not if you're reading this. Ha!) opinion, was nerd dude Louis' package for Dexter. What the hell was he drawing on the Ice Truck Killer hand?? I am officially intrigued.

All in all, tonight's show wasn't all that bad considering the crap we've had to put up with the last couple of weeks. Although Dexter didn't kill anyone, I am eager to see him make up for it by planning a very special sendoff for Travis next week.

Tidbits

- I seriously expected a main character to get killed tonight. It's still possible (well, not tonight). Please, let it be LaGuerta! Quinn gets a pass for saving Batista's ass (hey, that rhymed).
- The expected symptoms for minimal exposure to the Wormwood gas were nosebleeds and dizziness. It doesn't take a genius to guess Dex is gonna get dizzy at the exact wrong moment. That's what makes (or used to make) good TV.
- Nerd dude Louis. What do you think? Prospective bad guy?
- I sense an epic and religiously symbolic death for Travis. The viewers deserve that much, right?

The season finale's next week. I'm already starting to miss this show. Actually I've been missing it for some time. Sad face.

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Boss - What Just Happened?

I'll tell you what happened. Kelsey Grammer just won himself a freakin' EMMY! I just watched the season finale of Boss a couple of hours ago and boy, if there ever was a moment in television history that needed to be remembered, it's this one.

After the maw-gaping episode last week where Kane practically sent a massive 'screw you' message to all the individuals on the wrong side of his band wagon, this week's show went a step further by getting its hands dirty, then rolling around in the mud and finally peeing all over it.
What an episode, folks! The results of the gubernatorial primary were finally revealed with a bruised and bloodied Zajac (literally) emerging as the winner. Now that Zajac is basically Kane's sock-puppet, season two will hopefully involve more embarrassing moments for the newly elected governor of Illinois.

The focus however, was on Kane and Stone as they steamrolled through the remnants of Alderman Ross's plan in order to re-establish Kane's supremacy. Things looked like they were running smoothly for the Mayor until the whereabouts of the elusive nurse Debra (who he tried to strangle a few weeks back) became known. So obviously Stone sent unnamed gray haired dude to finish her off. Except he didn't (really good room service. They save your life and everything!). When Kane decide to pay Debra a visit to the hospital, he was in for a nasty surprise.

The writers of Dexter's currently abysmal season should learn a thing or two about how to reveal a twist from this show. I didn't expect Stone to be the leak. Didn't have a clue. The astonishment and ultimate disgust on Kane's face was brilliantly executed by Grammer. Ezra's speech about Kane's fall from grace and his own ultimate moral awakening should alone earn Martin Donovan an Emmy nomination as well.

Ezra's ultimate death was intense. His expression after being shot had a certain degree of contentment which suggested he died with a clear conscious. Bravo, Martin Donovan!

American Horror Story is NOT the scariest show on television.
Kane's godfatheresque approach to his political and personal life has now led to his daughter's incarceration, his wife's disgrace and the death of his closest confidant of thirty years. I am shit scared of this guy!

Tidbits

- Did anybody feel sorry for Kane in the final scene? I didn't.
- So who was unnamed gray haired dude really working for? Kane or Stone?
- Tom Kane makes me piss my pants. I'm not kidding. Look at the picture. Look at it!
- This show should receive a barrage of Emmies. If it doesn't, I will eat Jane Timoney's hat.

That's it. Fridays are officially empty from next week. Sniff.

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Person Of Interest - Family, Friends & Big Ass Grenade Launchers

Thursday nights rock!! There are just too many shows to watch and not enough time. After an hour or so of comedy, it's on to the serious stuff, and it doesn't get any more serious than the most kickass show on television right now, Person Of Interest.

I've mentioned before how much this show gets my blood pumping and tonight was no different. 'Get Carter' was by far the most exciting storyline I was eager to watch and it did not disappoint. Reese has protected or pursued some really memorable characters over the past couple of months. So when Finch's machine pooped out Detective Carter's number, Reese's left eyebrow twitched a little indicating significant astonishment. The idea of protecting the very person intent on hauling his keester off to jail presented an interesting and unique challenge for Reese. And it wasn't easy.

With a gun-running gangster, a wife-beater (a real person, not a sleeveless shirt), and a certain high profile (yet inexplicably inconspicuous in a POLICE PRECINCT) mobster named Elias all gunning for Carter's head, Reese and Finch had their work cut out for them. But our favorite dynamic duo handled the situation with absolute aplomb and finesse, and of course a grenade launcher had to be involved.

But seriously guys, how cool was Reese in this episode? He appeared to be wearing and using the stuff I have on my Christmas Wish list. Let's see -

- Awesome jacket, check.
- Amazingly cool motorcycle, check
- Wicked crazy sub-machine gun, check
- Big ass grenade launcher, check

See what I mean?

When Carter's CI turned out to be the real threat, it was a nice enough twist, although not exactly unexpected. What was great to watch was the absolute synchrony with which Reese, Finch and Fusco worked together. It was like clockwork, and brought out the fact just how awesome this show has become.

For about half a second, I thought it was curtains for Carter, which would have been an earth shattering step for the show. Who knows? It could have worked. Killing off a main character this early in the season would have put the show on the map, or it could have backfired. Tough call for the writers, but in the end probably the right one.

It was good to get more background info about Joss Carter (that's her name, according to Reese). From her past, which included her stint as an army interrogator to her present as a cop and a mother, it gave us an opportunity to get to know her better instead of just making her out to be the reason why Reese hasn't used the full extent of his badassness.

Tidbits

- Did you know it was a good eight minutes (including ads) into the show before Reese made an appearance? I didn't notice. And he's the best part of the whole damn thing. That's how good this show is!
- Did anybody else smile when Reese called Finch 'Harold'? I think he's mocking you, Finch.
- After the items already mentioned, Fusco's gift wrapped police doll camera is next on my wishlist.
- I'm eager to see another Reese-Elias showdown. Aren't you?

Ah, Thursdays. It's a pity you only come once a week.

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Community - Trimming The Hellraiser

How awesome is this show?? I'd promised myself not to watch it anymore until next year (I'm trying to cut down. My therapist says I watch too much TV). But 30 seconds into tonight's episode 'Regional Holiday Music', and I was telling my resolve to go take a hike.

This episode was 22 minutes of pure comedy gold! There have been a lot of failed comedies this season and I want all of them to take notes. As far as I'm concerned, this was a hit-or-miss episode, and if any show on the face of the galaxy could pull it off, it's Community. Bear in mind, tonight's show wasn't nearly as good as 'Remedial Chaos Theory' or 'Modern Warfare', but compare this to any episode of Whitney (blech) or even New Girl (the 'breakout' comedy of this season). The difference is in light years.

I'm proud to admit I've never seen a single episode of Glee, nor will I ever see one. A lot of Glee fanatics would not have been amused by this. I DON'T CARE.
Lines like 'Abed, you look gleeful' made me laugh like a hyena! This show had its share of funny moments including Annie's embarrassing bit for Jeff (accompanied by a proportional drop in her IQ. Yikes, Glee fans must be livid!), Dr. Gleekenstein's (actually his name was Cory) hissy fit and to top it all off the most delightful forty seconds of my life which involved Dean Pelton, Senor Chang, Star Burns, Lenard, Magnitude and a bunch of Christmas ornaments. Genius!

And how long have we waited for Troy and Abed to re-enter the rap scene?? Ever since 'La Biblioteca' entered my life, I have yearned for the moment when these two would break it down again. Bravo, you crazy freaks!

Explain to me again WHY this show isn't coming back for NBC's mid-season schedule, because I am thoroughly nonplussed.

Tidbits

- Wanna guess what my new ringtone is gonna be? No, not Troy and Abed's rap song. Britta singing as the Mouse King was music to my ears.
- Fun fact. I used to be a reverse bully in high school.
- Taran Killiam was just plain irritating as Cory. Bring him back soon!
- The 'three wise monkeys' scene by the girls during Troy and Abed's study room performance was so hilariously subtle. Just how much thought do they put into this show??

Person Of Interest is on tonight. Thursday nights are freakin' awesome!!

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American Horror Story - Gimp Suit Madness

So how disgusted are you feeling right now?? A lot? Every episode in this freak show of a series has left us with the need to take a cold, long shower to wash off the gunk of human (and spectral) nastiness associated with it. The message is clear - Be prepared to be grossed out every week, and like it.

So after the supposedly 'massive' revelation that one of Vivien's twins is the Antichrist, this episode followed up by completely forgetting about it and focused on Violet, Tate and the late boy-toy Travis's murder. After being absent from the previous episode (and from school apparently, where the hell was she?), Violet reinforced the opinion that of all the pissed off teenagers on the face of the planet, she is the worst, and the dumbest. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that she's a GHOST.

Oh yes! The big reveal tonight was that Violet is indeed dead. Kudos to the twisted freaks who called it right after the bathtub scene a few episodes ago. I didn't.
But this is where I got really confused (it doesn't take a lot). So can Violet leave the house or not? When I say house, I mean house minus garden. In one scene, she went all the way to the gate. But in the next, she barely got out the front door. Watch the scene again. You'll see what I mean. The discrepancy is not negligible, writers! It's a big ass garden.

Besides, Hayden could leave the house when she got arrested by Luke. Moira left the house on Halloween (but not on any other day apparently). What the bleedin' hell is going on here? Writers. Kindly clarify.

Meanwhile, Constance became the prime suspect in Travis's murder, and she didn't like it one bit. After some huffing and hawing (the hawing involved trying to cut crazy Larry's balls off), she discovered that one of the ghosts inside murder house (Hayden, but Constance doesn't know that) killed Travis and Larry just disposed of the body. Larry ended up confessing to the crime because he felt guilty about his previous actions. You know, the actions that made his wife burn herself and her kids. Is it just me, or did the sight of his kid's burnt faces actually register genuine regret on his face? Believe it or not, he was actually my best character on the show. His incarceration indicates that we may have seen the last of him. Bollocks.

I honestly don't know what to make of this episode. I enjoyed Ben getting his ass kicked. But, if there is anyone in this show who needs a good ol' fashioned tune up, its Tate. Maybe Constance should pay him another visit.

Tidbits

- Being a resident Hooplehead, I was glad to see Deadwood alumni W. Earl Brown (the Verminator) again. Now I really hate Tate. Nobody messes with Dan Dority!
- Constance's lawyer. He's the guy from Hostel, right? And Dumb and Dumberer? His talent agent sucks!
- No more crazy Larry? Bollocks again.
- Jessica Lange has been spectacular throughout this series. It needed to be said.

Yes, I'll be tuning in next week. Don't ask me why. Shut up and watch.

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New Girl - Bland And Icky

Tuesday nights are so boring nowadays! Even NCIS has lost its charm (sorry fans, it just has). I need my TV shows every night to be entertaining and enthralling. So desperate was I this starry night (I didn't go out to check, it might have been starry), that I tuned in to New Girl for an embarrassingly third time this season.

The harping and the hype associated with this annoying show is beyond me. Zooey Deschanel is supposed to be quirky and adorable. She is. I'll give her that.
But she ain't funny. Not by a long shot. Believe me, I tried to laugh, I really did (sob), but the laughs just weren't coming. Adorably weird, yes, Funny, no. And the singing doesn't help.

I honestly think a COMEDY show should elicit laughs. That's not too much to ask, is it? I'm not looking for realism. We have other shows for that (Boss. Starz. Awesome). I'm not looking for a moment during the show where I'm gonna go "Oh my God, that is sooo just like what happened to me last week" (best impression of my cousin I could manage). A COMEDY show should have more than one or two laugh out loud moments. Take tonight's episode for example. The only time I was close to laughing (well, maybe a guffaw), was when the blood spurted out of YouTube guy's head. And he's not even a main character. He was funnier than the main cast!!

I pine for the shows of old, like Everybody Loves Raymond or Frasier or even Becker (not seen Becker? Log off. Log off now!). These shows made me laugh. There were no gentle smiles. No giggling or the feeling of pleasant amusement. I'm talking belly-aching, spit-your-beer-onto-the-TV-screen laughs. Two and a Half Men used to do that for me. Well, it did until--that's an explanation for another day.

I'll probably be bombarded with insults and slurs and retorts about how big a jackass I am for not loving this cute and adorable show. I'm not looking for cute and adorable. I have my Teddy for that.
Give me laughs and I will give you positive reviews (I need to save that line. It's genius).

Tidbits

- All this hostility might just be directed towards Justin Long. I dunno, maybe.
- Pushing a pregnant woman into a pool is NOT funny. Tell me it is. I dare you.
- Every line from Danny Glover's grandfather was hilarious! And that guy's from The Office (Hank, the security guard). So does that make the show funny? Did I change my mind? Bring him back next week and let's see (yeah he's not coming back).
- So Zooey Deschanel is trying to win the affections of Justin Long. What's wrong with that picture?

Go ahead. Call me a moron. My opinion is ironclad.

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Supernatural - The Road Ahead

With almost five long weeks left for the next episode of my favorite show, my speculative juices (the juices that help me speculate, not the juices in my body that may or may not exist, wtf am I saying!!), were in overdrive last night so I decided to translate those garbled emotions into words.

Since my last review on 'Death's Door', I may have given the impression that Bobby's REALLY dead, and since then a lot of people have given me hell for being under that impression. There's a good reason for what I wrote.

HE IS DEAD, YOU MORONS!

Let's clear up a few things. Bobby's dead. Period. And however strongly you feel about it (not more strongly than I do) there's no changing that. The final scene with the Reaper and the choice he gives Bobby, leaves the option open for him to either cross over or remain in between the realm of the living and the dead. In other words, there's a chance he could choose to stay and possibly become a ghost. There! As simply as I can put it, without bursting a vein.

There was no cliffhanger at the end, guys! It wouldn't make sense for the writers to give us another cliffhanger at the end of a cliffhanger episode, especially since we had another cliffhanger in the episode a week before this one.

Now that we've cleared things up, time to discuss what's next for Sam and Dean. The Winchesters are not exactly in the best frame of their respective minds. With Lucifer playing hopscotch in Sam's head and Dean, well, who knows what the hell Dean is thinking, but whatever it is, it ain't pleasant, the Leviathans still need to be dealt with. Bobby's death may have triggered something we, the Supernatural universe, might have been waiting for a long time - Two Winchesters with nothing left to lose.

Leviathan Dick needs a Borax bomb shoved up his ass and the boys have to be more motivated now than ever before. We have 13 more juicy episodes left in this season and despite what's happened, I still think there's a much deeper storyline involved and the Leviathans may just be a piece that the Winchesters need to stomp over to find out what's really going on.

Those numbers Bobby wrote down on Sam's hand (454895) obviously hold the key. How many of you googled those numbers to see what would pop up?

I'm still thinking in terms of what's in store in the long run for this show. This is NOT the last season. It can't be. If there's a minute chance this show is gonna end soon (and I will burn this world to the ground if there is! Too dramatic?), season 8 should be epic. And when I say epic, this is how I want season 8 to be -

- Castiel needs to come back. Either in the season 7 finale or the season 8 premiere. Not as Jimmy whatshisname. As CASTIEL!

- Lucifer and Michael break free. Any storyline involving Lucifer, Michael and Crowley will be gold!

- Death. Julian Richings. Anywhere. Cool!

- Remember the glory days when Castiel and the Winchesters were in top form? Didn't Cas mention something about finding God?? I think it's about time God put in an appearance, don't you? Maybe God will show up with Bobby as his vessel. Awesome!

These are the ramblings of a deranged goop with too much time on his hands. Ignore them if you wish.

But seriously, FIVE WEEKS, YOU FREAKS!

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Dexter - Comédie des Méprises

Let's get one thing straight. I'm a big time fan of this show, have been since it began. I even start to drool a little every time Showtime releases a new promo. But after five seasons with varying degrees of brilliance, season 6 has been a washout.

Don't get me wrong, the show is still eons better than some of the crap out there (Whitney. Rubbish), but die hard fans expect a certain degree of magnificence from Dexter. And that is sorely lacking this season. Well, for the last four episodes anyway. Wait, didn't Brother Sam die four episodes ago?

The characters have been seriously dumbed down this season. Although incompetence is the rule at Miami Metro PD, Dexter in particular has been off his game. Everyone has a bad day, or even a bad week. But Dex has been fumbling and bumbling for a while now and that's not good. People may argue that Brother Sam's influence may have interfered with Dexter's blind faith in Harry's code, and that is definitely a good argument. But being one step behind at every turn, especially to a stick insect like Travis, does not make for good television. Remember how Dexter stalked Trinity? Trinity could kick Travis' ass.
Fatherhood has also been a suggested reason for Dexter's recent spate of questionable judgement. Although feasible, the perpetual hold his Dark Passenger has had on him far outweighs any confounding factors that would prevent him from doing what he does best.

We expect Dexter's kills to be poetic. Nobody wants to see him drown his victims or jump someone from behind, or stab someone with a pitchfork. That's what normal killers do.

The show has made a mockery of its other beloved characters as well (except Debra), the most significant being Batista. In the first few seasons, Batista had a strong presence which commanded respect. Regardless of his decisions, he always had a certain credibility expected of him. Quinn's influence has seriously made him a cartoon of his former self. His marriage to LaGuerta didn't help. So is this character shift intentional? If it is, I don't get it.
Now that Batista is Travis's newest prisoner, I shudder to think what the writers have in store for him. Don't do it, Travis! Take Quinn instead.

I have no problems with the actors themselves though. They continue to do an awesome job, despite the writers. Even Quinn, who is supposed to portray a dick, has now become the perfect dick.
A special mention for Jennifer Carpenter, who is, in my opinion the Star of season six.

Remember the scene with the Four Horsemen? That is the kind of jaw dropping excitement we expect from this show. That's what separates it from the rest.

Tidbits

- Quinn has got to be the most hated character on television. Well, maybe a notch below Leviathan Dick from Supernatural.
- What is nerd dude Louis' deal?? The writers need to elaborate. And soon. I hope it's not just a man crush. Wonder how Dexter would handle that!
- Travis's accomplices. How boring was their marriage??
- I'm still hopeful that Brother Sam will make an appearance as the newest inhabitant of Dexter's subconscious. Why not? Brian came back. This would be way cooler!

We have 2 episodes left and the promo for next week suggested that Dex will bounce back with a vengeance. It should be interesting. Unless the writers screw up again.

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Hell On Wheels - White Men Can't Jump

The title 'Bread and Circuses' didn't give us much of an indication what this episode was about (until I saw the promos, of course). Nevertheless, Hell On Wheels gave us another engaging episode that kept us on our toes. I only wish Cullen had done the same.

Ol' 'Twinkle Toes' Bohannon found himself on the wrong side (is there a right side?) of Elam's fist this week. Here's the nub of the story. With the construction of the railroad going through some financial difficulties, Cullen informed his foot soldiers (though he was not supposed to. Nice going, genius!) that they won't be getting payed for a second consecutive week (except for the walking bosses. They always get paid. Lucky bastards). So obviously, the grumpiest character on AMC (let's call him Elam), acquired a bug up his ass and got in Cullen's face. And we all know how men settle their differences in the west. A gunfight! Nope. You beat the crap out of each other.

This epic battle between the Titans of Gruff was cut short by Durant, who instead decided to make the bout official (and if a little money was made in the process, who's gonna complain? That Durant! Always working the angles). The rest of the episode pretty much revolved around the fight. After the expected back and forth, Elam ended up delivering the final punch that floored Cullen and for the first time in five episodes, Cullen Bohannon became human.

Up until now, we have seen our hero handle every situation he faced with the utmost Clint Eastwoodness (pardon the comparison. Couldn't come up with a better word). His loss to Elam brought things back down to earth. But contrary to what you may think, this defeat actually made him cooler than before. My favorite scene was Cullen lying on the floor, contemplating the humor of his situation. I found myself laughing along with him in the end. I'm starting to really like this guy!

In the meantime, increased Union presence in the area compelled Reverend Cole (Tom Noonan, yay!) and Joseph to pay a visit to Chief Many Horses, who also happens to be Joseph's dad. Expect the Chief to visit our favorite dusty settlement next week to start the 'peace' process.

Lily finally decided to tell Durant that she does have the bloomin' maps he's been looking for. In exchange, she asked for recognition for her late husband's work. That's not an unreasonable request, is it?

This episode continued the upward trend the show has been having. Now that we've eased into the characters, this is gonna be fun to watch!

Tidbits

- Lily Bell looked mighty fetching in this episode. She literally lights up every time she sees Cullen. Her husband's been dead for how long?
- The Swede is awesome! Nuff said.
- Durant was kind of a dick in this episode. Lily should have held onto the maps for a little longer.
- Cullen and Elam, the Titans of Gruff. Catchy, isn't it? And guys, what's with all the hostility? I thought you two were best buds. Elam just ran out of friends.
- I secretly wanted Cullen to win, just to see if Common might actually change his facial expression this season.

Too sleepy to type. Dexter. Review. Tomorrow.

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Boss - Frasier's a Badass!

How the hell did I forget to include this awesome show in my poll?? I need to get my marbles in order. I saw Boss last night. And after watching Supernatural's spectacular episode, I didn't expect the night to get any better. But it did!! It did like a MOTHER.

For the unenlightened, Boss is the newest addition to the STARZ network's list of underrated and mind numbingly good shows (except Camelot. Camelot sucked). I've been watching this show since it began and damn, it's good!

It follows Tom Kane (Kelsey Grammer, the new God of Television), the mayor of Chicago who gets diagnosed with a degenerative neurological disorder called DLB (Dementia with Lewy Bodies). The condition is quite similar to Parkinson's disease so you can imagine how difficult it must be. The series follows how he tries to run the city with an iron fist, at the same time juggling his political and personal life while concealing his condition from everyone (including his wife).

Without revealing too much of the story (watch this show, dudes! Seriously!!), Kane is portrayed as cold, brutal and ruthlessly calculating in his actions. Never before have I rooted for such a genuinely vicious character. It takes an exceptionally cold-blooded person to sell out his own family for political gain, and Kane does it multiple times. Everybody knows politics is a dirty business, but the way Kane operates, you hope against hope that the depiction is unrealistic.

Kelsey Grammer delivers an awe-inspiring, breathtaking and mind-blowingly awesome performance as Tom Kane. He's just that FREAKIN' GOOD. I grew up watching Frasier reruns in the evenings and I've always been a fan, but slap my ass and call me Judy (I got that from an old episode of Friends)! He's just that FREAKIN' GOOD! Grammer radiates this aura of malevolence, so much so that he almost intimidates you across the screen. His performance in itself is brilliant enough to carry the show on its shoulders, but as fate seems to have blessed this show with unlimited awesomeness, the supporting cast is exceptional as well.
Connie Nielsen as Meredith Kane, Tom's wife and Martin Donovan as Ezra Stone are two other characters who blow the socks off their respective roles. A special mention for Francis Guinan as Governor Mac Cullen. He's got the most humorous case of potty mouth I've ever seen!

The story is too engrossing to delve into here. Suffice to say you will not be disappointed. The character of Tom Kane is already in the league of other famous names like Walter White, Vic Mackey and Al Swearengen. And Grammer already has a trophy case containing all his Emmies and Golden Globes. I suspect it's time to get another one.

The show has already given us seven good episodes in what will be a short season. With only the finale left, I wholeheartedly recommend you watch this show from the beginning. You won't regret it!

Tidbits

- Until episode 7 (Stasis), the storyline involving Kane's daughter Emma and Darius, the drug dealer was a complete waste of space, on paper and on screen.
- People should watch the first six episodes just to watch episode 7. A lot of bone crunching moments that literally make you gape like a fish.
- Zajac is my worst character on the show. Which makes episode 7 so sweet!
- In case you haven't noticed, I loved episode 7 the best.

Dexter and Hell On Wheels are coming up tomorrow night. I'm conveniently not mentioning The Walking Dead because I need some catching up to do. I do work for a living, you know.

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